To the libraryyyy!

I dodn't trust that old lady dogg her eyes are too close together

.

Home again, home again, jiggety-jig. Gooooood evening, JF.

Alright, holidays are over and we’re all back at work being miserable bastards, wishing we’d spent those two weeks off on something meaningful like learning Cantonese instead of playing Arkham Horror and Netrunner and eating shit-tonnes of dead cow. I blame the media, personally. And who/whatever decided dead cow would taste so delicious.

So a cool thing happened just before the break (a couple of cool things happened actually, but most of them involve STORMDANCER getting onto various Important End of Year Listsβ„’ and nobody cares about that except me and possibly my mother) which I’d like to tell you about.

See, there’s this dude called Wil Wheaton. If you haven’t heard of him… I’m not sure what I can do for you. To give you an idea of scale, his cat’s twitter feed has more followers than mine does. In fact, if I can be brutally, Real Talk honest with you, one of my driving goals in life is to have more followers than Wil Wheaton’s fucking housepets.

(While I’m being all R Kelly with you all, I should take a moment to share my deep-seeded suspicions that it’s not actually Wheaton’s cat running that Twitter feed. He’s a pretty cool guy, granted, but no way is his cat smarter than my dog, and my dog has as much chance of conducting a coherent conversation on Twitter as my penis does… now there’s a thought... )

Anyway, Ser Wheaton runs this blog that I’ve been reading since before cats learned to operate keyboards, and I figured since I’d been reading Wil’s stuff for free, I should return the favor. I shot him a mail and offered to send him a copy of STORMDANCER in thanks for the hours of geekery/poker/tv/film I’ve seen him in. And in a display of 100% badassery, Ser Wheaton instead read the jacket copy, immediately bought a copy of my book for his Kindle, and suggested I donate the physical copy I was going to send to him to a local library instead.

Yes. Ser Wheaton’s awesome amplifiers go up to 11.

So today. I finally got into Melbourne City Library, copy of SD in hand, with this little plaque thing on the inside cover.

Not the plaque that goes on yout teeth, fool.

Closer. CLOSERRRR.

I also scribbled my name in the front, but again, nobody cares about that except me and possibly my mum.

I tried to explain to the woman behind the counter that I was the author of the novel in my hand but it was Wil Wheaton who was actually donating it. Sadly, her english wasn’t awesome and I suspect she thought I was trying to pass myself off as Wil himself, which is just crazy talk because I’m way taller than him and potentially better looking in dim nightclub lighting even if his fucking cat does have 6,000 followers, I mean JESUS IT’S A CAT, PEOPLE.

But anyway, this is the building where that book lives now. Feel free to steal it (the book, not the building, although stealing the building would be redlining the badass-o-meter).

Just in case all the books and librarians didn't give it away...

Happy New Year and all that jazz, peoples. Hope your holidays were spiffing, pip-pip, what ho old bean.

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About Misterkristoff

New York Times and Internationally Bestselling SciFi/Fantasy author, and master of drunken karaoke-fu. View all posts by Misterkristoff

23 responses to “To the libraryyyy!

  • Tez Miller

    Cleary Jay Kristoff’s Dog needs his own Twitter account. (I’m not crude enough to suggest Jay Kristoff’s Penis should have his own account πŸ˜‰ )

  • nrlymrtl

    I read this post out loud to my man over the phone, to help him while away his last 10 minutes at work. He was also curious about Wil Wheaton’s cat’s twitter feed, so thanks for that link.

    I bought myself 5 books in my Yeah-Made-It-Through-the-Holidays-Without-Burning-Bridges celebration. Your Stormdancer was one of those 5.

  • Braiden @ Book Probe

    Ummm.. so I’m going to go Melbourne City Library and steal it. Okay? I have a library card for there. BUT I WILL NOT USE IT! Good work Wil. You made Jay walk into a library and donate his own book. Pro.

  • Kalliope

    You got two weeks off? I’m uh, confused as to how you have an allotted amount of time off…
    I hate the week and weekend after vacation. It feels like punishment for relaxing over break.

    • Misterkristoff

      Just the way the public holidays work down here. you take 7 days leave and end up with something like 15 days off in a row around xmas.

      And I hear ya about punishment for relaxing after the break. i took two weeks off the gym and I’m paying for it now…

  • Kalliope

    And you play Netrunner? I’ve played that (though not all the way through; I had to go to sleep). My dad has dozens of games and we recently got that one. I love most of the graphics, but I’m reluctant to play again because I got confused. The company’s role seems a lot weaker and more defensive than the hacker guys’ ones. I was beating my dad on pure luck and I didn’t understand what I was doing. But, like my dad says, trying again will probably make it clearer.
    What other games do you play? You’re like, the only person I know who knows board games that are good (meaning, NOT Monopoly – Scrabble is okay but doesn’t count because everyone knows it). So I’m fascinated.

    • Misterkristoff

      Company role is more defensive, yeah. Although a couple of the corps (NBN and Weyland) have more offensive strategies revolving around tracing and punishing the runner (taking their money, blowing them up, etc). i prefer running myself, but I think that’s the anarchist in me wanting to STICK TO THE MAAAAAN.

      What else do we play… well, we’ve played a bit of Settlers of Catan, although that’s a bit vanilla for me. We play Battlestar Galactica, Game of Thrones, fair bit of Arhkam Horror recently. A card game called Dominion which is pretty cool. And I play the Game of Thrones LCG too, which is a lot of fun πŸ™‚

  • Briareos

    I should probably not mention that you can play AH and Netrunner online for free. I have a weekly board game group myself and Highly recommend the games Power Grid and Defenders of the Realm.

    • Misterkristoff

      I’ve seen the online games for Netrunner out of OCTGN (they play aGoT there too) but I cbf’ed figuring out how to use the UI. Probably for the best – I’ve got no time for games on regular weeknights, it’s all pretty much book 2 atm. πŸ˜€

  • DebE

    I love blog posts that make me laugh, and you sir, make me laugh. Yes, I will buy your book!

  • Audrey

    …I just followed Wil’s cat on twitter. My apologies to your ego.

    in other news, awesome! πŸ™‚

  • Angelya

    How very nice of Mr Wheaton! I have to say that if I picked up a book at my library and it was signed by the author I’d be squeeing rather a lot, let alone been apparently donated by a celebrity!
    I hope Wil’s cat enjoys Stormdancer πŸ™‚

  • Melissa

    How many followers do you have? I don’t tweet..but if it will help you pass a cat up on a social media forum i’ll take one for the team. I already like you on fb..and I read your blog…twitter seems like the cyber stalker line I should not cross…

  • Melissa

    Woops!!! Yay about Wesley crusher having your book ( the jar jar binx of the star trek world) that’s a whole lot of awesomeness in one place.

  • DJL

    Now I have another goal for when I get to the land down under. I MUST visit the Melbourne Library (even if I totally cannot get a card there… since the fines for a late book would be astronomical for this US librarian). Totally kickass what Mr. Wheaton did for the library and for you, Jay. πŸ˜‰

    Also, I know a group of readers who would be THRILLED to get your John Hancock on their books in the US, so the excitement’s not limited to just you and deine mutter. Melbourne’s lucky to have one!

  • Karen H

    Did you know you made the shortlist and final vote for Australia’s Favourite Author on the booktopia blog?
    Voting is still open, so get your minions on it!!

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